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About myself (little insight on me)

Well where do I start?

Childhood;
I was born on the 18th of September in a city in wales called Newport :), I was names after 2 celebrity’s; kirsten o Brian (of smart) and Alex Ferguson (oh no), not going to lie I was such a cute little girl as a baby! I remember some good memories about my childhood like having friends which were male and we would always either be playing football or climbing in bushes or trees or just messing around like typical young boys! I loved playing football, rugby and my passion as a kid was swimming, I just remember constantly going swimming and I remember when they said I was allowed to join the swimming club (Cwmbran otters)! That’s all I remember, I was always out and about doing something, I was always outside and it was what I enjoyed doing! Another memory that stands out within my younger age is bullying, I wasn’t feminine, I was nerdy and I wore glasses which screamed out ‘freak’!

teenage years;

I remember at the age of 12 my mum told me I was going to have a younger brother/sister and I was absoloutly devistated because I was the youngest child (I have an older sister)! The day ruby was born will forever be a big memory that happened in my teen years! When I was 13 my dad left me, walked out on me and hasn’t bothered since! Since hitting puberty I didn’t like who I was and who I was becoming, this was a terribly hard time for me developing into a person I didn’t feel like I was and the man of my life leaving for no reason and with the amount of bullying I encountered throughout high school was stupid, I got called fat, tranny, dyke, freak, dumb, ugly, lesbo to name a few!! I ended up turning to bad addictions like self harm, drugs and eating issues! I don’t really remember memories about these periods of my life other than I was angry and everybody hated me, I was failing school, I didn’t care about myself and I honestly just wanted to die! I tried to become happy by ‘accepting who I was’ I came out as bisexual in year 9 because I thought it was me but I didn’t feel happy Or comfortable, in year 10 I came out as a lesbian because I also thought it was me but it wasnt me! In January 2013 I managed to let my mum allow me to have all of my hair cut off, and I was the most happiest kid ever, I loved it! As a kid and as a teenager I was always masculine, I didn’t experience gender dysphoria until I hit puberty but I thought it was ‘normal’ so I didn’t bother speaking to anybody, but one day someone mentioned transgender people to me and I researched it and automatically i related to it, I felt like a boy, I just wasn’t biologically female. I hated my genitals and i hated having a feminine body, I always wanted to be ‘one of the boys’ and I always wanted to be male! So at the age of 15 I told my best friend about the way I felt and she was so understanding about it, I spoke to my other friend and she said shed start to call me Alex and use male pronouns and that’s when my life begun!
Life now;

I’m 17 years old, I’m officially 470 days clean from self harm and I help nearly 11,000 people on a daily basis, I’m a transgender female to male teen trying to make a happy life! I’m proud to say that im transgender, I still suffer with gender dysphoria ( and I might always do I never no) but I’m getting there:) I hardly ever get bullied and I’m respected by everybody. My life has changed so much since coming out to two people, its unreal! This is me and this is my life and I’m proud to say who I am!

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